An Elvis Kinda Christmas

I'll have a blue Christmas without you
I'll be so blue just thinking about you
Decorations of red on a green Christmas tree
Won't be the same dear(s), if you're not here with me...

I spent my first Christmas without my children and that was very sad for me. My oldest daughter pulled up stakes and moved to Texas last month, without telling me goodbye, because she couldn't bear to "hurt me." Newsflash: It hurts more that I didn't get a hug goodbye! :-( I think it was just as likely she wouldn't face me because it would be too difficult for her to go if she had to say goodbye, so she just left.(A very long & somewhat complicated story that I may tell another day.) I have been feeling the loss over the holidays, but she emailed and texted yesterday, and said she would call in the evening, which gave me some hope. My other two children, who "took over her apartment," were no shows, and when I learned they weren't joining us for our traditional Christmas at my folks' house, I was deeply saddened. I wish children, no matter their age, would understand that they will change friends many times over the years, but your family will never change, and times with them are precious & limited. I guess, as very young adults, they need to learn these things in their own way, and their own time, but it doesn't make it easier for the parents. I cried most of the way to my parents' house.

I was running pretty late getting to our celebration, so every one else had already gathered. It is fairly overwhelming to walk into my mom's living room, as there is no porch, entryway or foyer...you are just thrust right into the chaos that is dozens of people getting caught up with each other. As soon as I walked in, I was bombarded with "Hey, how are you? " I don't know how many times I was asked before I fell apart, and was immediately ushered into a mini counseling session with my private therapist...my oldest sister is a licensed therapist and deals with these situations all the time. It helped to unleash emotions, at least some of them, and then I tried to put on my happy face. After all, I was looking forward to a phone call from my oldest daughter. The call never came, so I was disappointed by that. I did pretty good at keeping my happy face on most of the evening, as long as no one was prying. Yes, they care, and want to be supportive, but I didn't want to be the bah humbug of the party.

On the flip side, all of my thirteen siblings were present and that is a feat in itself. It was good to see everyone. We were able to get the first group photo since we last took some in 2002 at my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. Officially, there were 49 of us together for the evening meal yesterday, and we actually ran low on some food (that doesn't happen often), but there were plenty of sweets to compensate. Still, there were six grandchildren & 2 of their spouses, as well as 3 great grandchildren missing. Our family is now officially at 60, not including "significant others." We actually "lost" two in-laws over the last number of years (divorce), so we had once topped 60. My niece is expecting a baby at the end of March; the numbers continue to rise. With several nieces and nephews now in their late teens and early to mid twenties, I predict a snowball effect soon, as the marriages & babies start to come in quick succession.

My parents are aging a little (don't tell them that, though). My mom fell on Monday evening, severely bruising her shin. She had shopped the evening away with my sister, then went to visit another sister. After her injury, my sister called the Blue Cross help line, & checked in with the hospital, as well. My mom is diabetic, and the family was worried about blood clots, etc. The lady on the end of the help line really wanted to know why my sister had an "elderly" woman out so late (11:30 p.m.). My mom & sister were shocked to hear Mom referred to as elderly. We just don't think of her as old, and neither does she! She is almost 77, but she just doesn't act like it! The injury was somewhat of a blessing in disguise, as she had to sit with her leg elevated and be waited on. No matter how hard we try to get her to ease up on the holidays, she usually doesn't. I must say, after not being required to work in the kitchen, she looked so much less tired than was the case at Thanksgiving.

As blue as I was about my children's absence, I surely count the blessings that are my parents. I treasure every additional day and holiday we can gather together. I wish my children would appreciate how lucky they are to be part of a large family with living grandparents. By the time I was 5 1/2, I only had one grandfather left. I so treasured my visits with him, and if I could go back, would have even spent more time with him. He was with us until I was 20.


Here is an attempt at a family photo (parents & siblings only...well except for that one niece that sneaked in for one). It is just difficult to get the group to be "on task," especially with all the ADHDers in my family. (Professional photos always require a very skilled photographer, especially when we try to get the WHOLE group to look in one direction, at the same time!) The problem with multiple photographers is everyone chooses a different photograher to look at.;-) My 18 year old niece was so cute, as she took photos with several cameras. "Oh, this is so cute!" "Aww, precious...I'm so touched." Funny, sweet girl.



And here...my mom's tree, with her eclectic collection of ornaments.

Other blessings in my family are just being around all the nieces and nephews & great nieces and nephews. I have a couple favorite "finger play" rhymes I started doing with the little ones a few years ago, and as soon as I walk in, I have several holding their palms out to do the "Little Hare Chased by the Cat," which is then followed by "Criss Cross Applesauce." I suppose this started about four years ago, and some of the original children, now four years older, are still looking for me to share this with them. It has become a tradition, and I hope they have warm memories of this when they think back on their childhood memories. I suppose they'll be blogging about it in a couple decades. LOL! Of course, it probably won't be blogging any more, as we'll have moved on to some more technologically advanced form of communications.


Hope your Christmas was merry and you were able to spend cherished time with your loved ones!

(Previously published 12-26 @ Area Voices)

Christmas Gremlins

...so, the Christmas Gremlins came my way...must have wanted a reprieve from picking on Farside, for awhile. I sent my husband back to retrieve my mom's anniversary photo album, then on to St. Cloud yesterday to get the last picture scanned that was missed in my Mom's /sibling's project...see previous blog. He brought it home, I popped it in, the drive started to run and run and run...but nothing. Popped it in my work laptop, still nothing. Spent several hours on that last night, still nothing. This morning, my CD/DVD drive wasn't working; luckily a reboot took care of that. Tried to run the CD again, to no avail. I think it should have been burned to a DVD, not CD, as the original scans were. I knew this was going to need another trip...or hang it up all together.

Early this morning, we headed off to drop my daughter's car off for new tires and get some last minute grocery shopping done. Swiped my debit card in the reader--it wouldn't authorize. My husband swiped his--again, it wouldn't authorize. The lady on the next aisle...same thing. Unfortunately, neither my husband or I had our checkbooks along. I ended up getting cash out of the ATM, which cost two dollars for that bank, and probably another charge at mine. It was a system problem at Walmart (I think it was overloaded), but I feel sorry for the cashiers & customer service people that have to deal with irritated customers. I am not one of those...I go with the flow; heck, they're just the little people...they can't help the glitches. My daughter was a CSM for several years, and she had to deal with that flack alot. I bet she isn't missing that on her first Christmas season not working there!

After getting home, we determined we will try the scanning project one more time. My hubby wanted to stop at McCann's Brew Pub & refill growlers for Christmas gifts, anyway, so he has been assigned the duty. This will be our fourth trip to get this done right. Again, it is just one of those computer glitches...I am guessing Office Max will not want to take that kind of project on again! I definitely have my fingers crossed this time.

I get to bake today, finally. Friendship bread, fruitcake, beer bread & some fudge. I am tempted to whip up a batch of divinity, as well, after Buffalo Gal blogged on it. I haven't made it in forever. The food prep for tomorrow (our celebration day), is to cut up bread cubes (I think I'll toast some of those), as well as grapes, apples, cauliflower, and broccoli. We also have ham cubes, pretzel braids, and tortilla chips. We are going to do a cheese fountain, which I've not tried, but I thought chocolate (which I haven't tried yet, either, despite having this fountain for a year) was too sweet with everything else we'll have at the buffet spread. Christmas is an enormous spread at my mom's, with so many siblings, and every body bringing one or two dishes, not including the cookie candy trays. I will also make my pina colada punch, which is simply a bottle of pina colada mix and a 64 oz bottle of cran-raspberry juice frozen overnight in an ice cream bucket. It is thawed slightly, then placed in a punch bowl. I pour in a bottle of raspberry ginger ale & it is gone in no time. The kids love it! I prefer the hot drinks: Tom & Jerrys--usually sans the alcohol, Chai Tea , or raspberry tea with a little hot chocolate mixed in! Yum!

I am also on a mission today to clip the dogs nails-or rather-sand them. I bought a new little grinder, called a "pedi-paws." We'll see how that goes...they hate nail grooming, so I picked up a muzzle, as well.

Well, time to don the apron & chef's hat & flour up the kitchen! Here's a little walk down memory lane...my first Christmas; I was not quite six months! My oldest sister was eight, the middle brothers were five & six; the twins had just turned two. Seven more children followed over the next sixteen years. Always a house of merriment!

Ann(8) holding Susie (5 1/2 mos.), Steve (5) holding Jim (2), Danny (6) holding Janet(2)

Merry Christmas to you and yours!!

(Originally published at Area Voices)

Sentimental Gifts

Christmas will be here before we know it and I am up late, again, trying to put together some sentimental gifts. We already purchased my parents a new dishwasher and had it installed before Thanksgiving. I usually make some sort of food gift for my siblings & their families. Last year it was Instant Tortilla Soup in a Mug (the little kids each got a tin of puppy chow). The Year before, beer bread. Previous year: Chai Tea. This year, I have eight Friendship bread starters "working" in the kitchen; they will multiply to 32 tomorrow!

I still always try to give something sentimental to my mom. One year I wrote my parents a book about their grandchildren. It has been a favorite & I had to rebind it this year. For her 75th birthday I wrote a poem that I framed. I would still like to turn that one into a book--maybe for her 77th? On her 70th, we made a book full of thank-you's (70 of them), each on 4x6 card stock & illustrated by my very artistic sister. This year, I got an idea when I was visiting my mom last Wednesday and saw her 50th Anniversary Photo Album was busting at the seams from all the handling. My very artistic sister scrapbooked two pages for each of their children as a gift for their anniversary. I decided to take it Wednesday...though my mom didn't want to part with it...to get the pages scanned to a DVD. I wanted to print out & laminate a kid friendly copy for the grandchildren to peruse, which should ease on the wear & tear. I also planned to copy DVDs for all my siblings. This way, we all have a copy, since many of us gave up our few one-of-a-kind photos for the project (not too many kid pictures are taken after the first couple kids, as those of you from large families may know).

The project is almost done, but not without a bunch of snags. I took the book to Kinkos, but their scanners weren't big enough for 12x12 pages. I then went to Office Max. Yes, they could do it. $7.99 for the first page, 1.99 for additional, and a fee to put it on DVD. The gentleman said, come back in a couple hours. It was Friday night...right before the storm. When we returned, they had some troubles. The files were too big & he couldn't do with them what he planned, but they were all scanned. They were taking too long to download. Could I maybe stop back tomorrow? Probably not in a blizzard...so, he was going to email them. That didn't work. The files were too big. Their computer has now crashed several times. Now it is late Saturday evening and he is trying to figure out how to shrink them. Sunday, I hear nothing. I call Monday, and the gal says the guy working on them will be in tomorrow and she knows of nothing she was supposed to finish. Right after supper, I get a call saying they had burned them to a DVD. I send my husband on the 2 1/2 hour round trip. He gets the DVD home. I pop it in my computer and immediately notice there were only 29 scans, not 30. I check my sales slip from Friday, and sure enough, there were only 29 scans done. Dang! Why I didn't I notice that Friday night? So, I open up each page to figure out who is missing. My youngest sister is missing one of her pages. I'll have to call in the morning to see if they can do the page, though it will be snowing, & not sure hubby would want to run back to St. Cloud, plus to my mother's to retrieve the album, which I had promptly returned to her Friday night. Plus, if they charge it as a new project, I'd have to pay $7.99 for the scan plus another DVD burned ($9.99 or something like that.) Poor guy working on this will probably run next time he sees someone walk in with such a project. I'm thinking about recording what I have to a re-recordable DVD, then having the other page done later. What would you do (besides come up with the idea a little earlier)?

Here are a couple of the pages...my Mom & Dad's Wedding Photo & part of one of my pages...

The shot below was shrunk & cropped, so it is a bit warped...not unlike myself! ;-)

Pictures, clockwise from bottom left: My brother (5-1/2) and me(4) holding up a fish almost as big as us. My 4th grade picture (almost 10). Here I am at 11 months (I still have that dress). My husband, the kids, and I in the Beatles booth at Hard Rock Cafe in Orlando --1997. The kids were 13, 10, & 7 at the time.

(Originally published @ Area Voices)

I Love to Write...I think?

I am a writing school drop-out! A few years ago, I was involved in an Institute of Children's Literature course. It was a guided study course. You read through assignments, write, turn in your writing assignments. Your assigned instructor reviews them and returns them with remarks on your abilities, errors, and pointers for change, etc. My "instructor" was Minnesota author Janet Graber. I enjoyed writing, and was doing well, while learning new skills. Unfortunately, I only made it about half way through the course before I "dropped out." Somehow, even though my lifelong dream was to be an author, life just took hold, full force, and I got too busy to write. One of the pointers is that to be a good writer, you should write daily. (I read many bloggers at Area Voices that do that well!)

At the time I quit writing, I had been working a full time seasonal job (April to October) and a half-time school year job. Therefore, the months of April to October left little time for anything but the daily grind. I worked on my writing and genealogy work mainly during the less busy time: November to March. Then the seasonal job went full time (and then some) and I couldn't find a moment to myself.

Over that two year period, I really missed my writing. I worked on an occasional personal piece, but nothing more. I started this blog in an attempt to start writing again. In the beginning, it was fairly easy to write, not usually daily, but at least several times a week. Then, around mid-summer, I started facing some severe career challenges. I am still working through some of those processes. I am currently laid off from my once-again seasonal job, and working a part-time job. After Christmas, I will be looking for some more work to supplement my part-time job. I would then be able to walk away (haltingly, though I should probably run) from the seasonal job, which has been a source of distress for some time now, as much as I love the work.
My oldest daughter recently added to my distress when she made some life altering decisions just totally out of character for her. (I'm not ready to blog about that, yet, or maybe never).

So, with the craziness that has been my life, I have not been blogging or writing much. I've been in a ruminating phase as of late. I am getting to the acceptance stage of my woes(partly by reading about those in more dire circumstances; I need to count my blessings). If I am successful with finding a way to supplement my part-time job to meet my budget, then I hope to find time to return to my dreams of writing once again in more earnest. For a small (unknown) fee, I could re-enroll in the course I dropped, since I had fully paid for it.

Meanwhile, I am content to come to Area Voices and mostly just read the blogs by the many talented writers. I still leave comments, too, and some of those end up being blog length. Participating at Area Voices nourishes my mind with the written word I love so well. It sparks a light in me that may soon be fully illuminated again.

Whether I return to the writing course, or try to work things through on my own, a regular "kick in the pants" from some of my regular readers may keep me going...hint, hint!!

I know there are others out there with dreams of publishing, and it is never too late. My former writing instructor (see link above) didn't publish her first book until age 60, then another a few years later. She will be releasing another in spring (which I think may be part of a trilogy). Keep on writing, friends. Even if it is just your friends and family that you write for, you will leave a legacy for the future. As a genealogy buff, I must impress upon you how important those little pieces of your life really are!

(originally published on my Area Voices Blog)

A Boy and His Dog

A Boy and His Dog
This is one of my absolutely favorite dog pics!

The handsome little chap, complete in his Lord Faunterloy suit, is my maternal grandfather. He was born in 1896, so I am judging this photo was taken about the turn of the century, which fits in with when this style of dress was still popular. Lucky for him, he did not have to wear the curls that were popular for boys then. I have photos of my other grandfather, in similar dress, but complete with "girly" curls.

I don't know much about the dog...like if he had a name or was a beloved pet, or only a photo prop. I love the touch with the cap in the dog's mouth. I will have to see what I can learn from my mom about this photo. I don't know if my grandpa always kept dogs, but I know he had great compassion for his final companion after my grandma passed. He had a little guy named Chico. I can't remember what breed it was; it was during those years when I was self absorbed (you know: the teen years). One night, while out doing his thing, he ran out and was hit by a car. Grandpa was living at his cabin on Little Mantrap Lake near Park Rapids at the time. I am surprised there was enough traffic on that little dirt road to be a danger. At the time, I never fully understood how deep a relationship could be formed with an animal, but my Grandpa was deeply affected by the loss.

I witnessed the same type of dedicated attention when my sister had her first Corgi. She adored Fiona. When it came time for Fiona's spaying, my sister had no inkling of what was in store. Fiona never recovered from the anesthesia. My sister took a long time to recover and donated all of Fiona's supplies, kennel, toys...everything, to the humane society. Eventually, despite her previous reservations, she became owner to another Corgi, Schatzi. Another dog that was pampered and often visited by a neighborhood "mutt," Woody. When the neighbors decided not to keep Woody after their son moved off to college, they offered him to my sister. My brother-in-law insisted they could not have another dog...no time, etc. The dog was taken to a shelter. Missing Woody's daily visits to Shatzi, my sister & her hubby began visiting Woody at the shelter, and next thing you know, my brother-in-law is adopting the dog they could have had for free. ;-) Woody was one of the nicest dogs you'd ever want around: gentle, playful, loyal. He must have got the best traits of all of his mixed breeding. I have great memories of our visits with them, especially when we visited in Europe. Dogs go everywhere there; even to restaurants, where they are often offered a water dish & treats, as they sit under the table while you dine. This past September, Woody was let out for his nightly jaunt through the woods in a very rural area of southwest Wisconsin. Sometimes he would lay chase on some small varmint in the woods. Long story short, he ended up a long way away at the highway, where he was hit and killed. My sister has beaten herself up over this turn of events and truly continues to mourn his loss.

Another sister just experienced a similar fate when she let her dog out to relieve himself, in a very rural area, and he just disappeared. Having lost another dog previously, she says she is done with dogs (we'll see). It is too hard to handle losing a pet.

I have two wonderful dachshunds, both rescued, one from a shelter, and one purchased from a neglectful owner. They have become such a big part of our lives. Every member of the family has deep affection for these dogs, which has been a great focus for us. I can't imagine how I will handle it when I must some day face their end days.

Knowing how important these companions are to so many, it bothers me deeply when I hear stories of abandoned or tortured dogs. Recently, a hunter discovered a mother dog and her ten pups, left to starve in an abandoned farm house. Five of the pups did not survive. The mother and the other pups were emaciated and are healing at the Tri-County Humane Society (St. Cloud). In another case, a morbidly obese border collie was found frozen to a sidewalk in Wisconsin. The owner is being charged with neglect.

Please people...do not get pets if you can't take care of them or don't intend to keep them forever! To those thinking of getting the kids a puppy for Christmas, remember, they aren't forever a cuddly puppy: they do grow up and they are a huge responsibility. Make sure your kids (or yourself) are ready for the responsibility, because a pet should have the committment of their owner for life! As Farside suggested in an earlier blog, it is better to wait until summer for adopting a pet, when children are out of school and have more free time to develop the habits of daily cares and attention. There is a lot of benefit for children learning that resposibility, but it needs to be well timed.

If you do get a dog, please look to adopt one from a shelter, as there are always many waiting for a happy home. And if you are one of those, thinking of giving up on your companion, simply put...How could you?

Pizza!

I am preparing to take time out for a little supper break...Papa Murphy's Pizza. My husband picked up the "Perfect Pizza." I'll eat the pineapple and ham, and he'll eat the pepperoni. I recall the first time I tried pineapple on pizza was 20+ years ago. I was visiting my sister in Minneapolis and my brother-in law suggested it. I thought he was nuts! One bite and I was hooked. It is one of my favorite kinds and for that particular combo, I think Papa Murphy's is the best.

This summer, for the first time, I was introduced to ranch dressing on pizza. Have you tried that? I love ranch dressing, but it didn't really "knock my socks off" on pizza.

I like just about any kind of pizza crust...thin crust, pan crust, thick crust, stuffed crust, french bread, etc. Pizza baked in wood fired, brick lined ovens in Italy were a special treat on our visit there. My hubby likes to make his own special version on the grill in the summer...thin & crispy, and tasting somewhat like the crusts from Italy.

As for toppings and sauces, I like almost anything, though I'm not crazy about pepperoni. What are your favorite pizza toppings? Do you have any "wierd" combinations? Do you have a favorite "brand?"

Pizza's here.....mmmmm. Smells great! Time to enjoy!