Seven Sisters

I am very lucky to be blessed with seven sisters. (I have 5 brothers, as well, but this post will be mostly about the sisters). We all spent the weekend together in Rochester (MN), to celebrate the fortieth birthday of my second youngest sister. We were also blessed to be joined by my ever youthful mother, 2 sisters-in-law, and 3 of the nieces (of which one was my youngest daughter, but niece to the rest;-}). The youngest niece in attendance spent much of her time at a friend's house or watching movies in her room, as this was an 18 and over ladies' event.

The age difference between the youngest sister and oldest sister is just over 19 years. The age group of those in attendance was 19 to 77, with occasional appearances by the nine year old niece. Currently, all but one sister live in Minnesota, though another will be packing her bags soon in pursuit of furthering her love for music in Austin, Texas. But no matter the age and distance, we can all come together and have a good time when a perfect occasion arises. We share lots of interests, whether it be delighting in the adventures of our children and grandchildren, our love of the various arts, a taste for kitchen delights, or our desire to scout out a bargain. Our world view may be somewhat varied and strongly held for some, so we glide away from some of those subjects during celebratory times. There are plenty of other times to get into heated discussions.

We spent part of our weekend taking in the 100 mile garage sale (Red Wing to Winona), though we only perused a smattering of them. Some of us were doing more looking than buying, but we were all having a good time, as evidenced by the many comments by sellers or other participants along the way. One of our missions, for those who chose to accept it, was the purchase of a "perfect" gift for the birthday girl. Those gifts were opened during the evening celebration and consisted of everything from a vintage 70's print of Jesus with His lambs, a collander/meat grinder lamp, a Mork & Mindy thermos, some 45 records of the seventies, a George Carlin book, a vintage felt Santa's Mail Christmas card holder, some coffee mugs, plus other items I've surely forgotten. Also, a few of us decided we would buy lemonade from all the budding child entepreneurs along the way--I quickly figured that I needed to limit my liquid intake, but luckily, some were selling cookies and bars, as well, so my old bladder could have a reprieve from the lemonade overload.

We spent another chunk of time this weekend in a favored activity: eating...from the awesome home cooked food (best hand-battered onion rings ever and I don't normally care for onion rings) at a tiny restaurant in Wabasha to the Chinese ordered in, to the variety of platters contributed by the sisters: fruit, cheese, and crackers; homemade cheesecakes baked by my sister's friend (Cinna-bun & a caffe-mocha flavor); chocolate fountain with pretzels, chips, strawberries, bananas, sugar cookies, marshmallows, brownie chunks, and even bacon; our family favorite: puffed wheat candy; tortilla chips and dipping sauces; and finally, my dad's contribution to the event and his latest "fad:" homemade peanut brittle and caramel corn. (I probably forgot a few things.) It should be fairly obvious from the above mentioned menagerie of food that most of us possess a sweet tooth.

Most spent some of their energies and calories on sipping wine, margaritas, and other spirits, though I stuck to my diet Pepsi. It seems somewhat unfair, then, that I was the one throwing up Sunday morning (I ended up with a severe migraine and did not remember to pack my Imitrex). Perhaps I consumed a bit too much chocolate and cheese, or maybe I just got too little sleep--all known migraine triggers.

Most of the weekend revolved around sharing stories and reviving and reliving family memories, watching a fun photo DVD organized by a couple of sisters, listening to great tunes, including five new songs written and sung by one of my very talented sisters, giving and/or getting foot/neck/back massages plus parrafin hand dips, and just generally chilling and laughing.

I feel so blessed to have taken part in this great weekend and know that I am luckier than many when it comes to spending time with my family. We truly do enjoy being together, and any differences of opinions and lifestyles are quietly ushered to the background while we focus on the love and commonalities that join us together. Given the great time we had, we hope to turn this into an annual event. I hope we will be making these types of memories for a long time!

Yes, Mary, you can be forty again next year, if you wish!

Life in the Rearview Mirror

I have been racing toward a finish line lately! I am on a path to getting things done as my time quickly slips away. I am at a point where the rubber meets the road. I am two weeks from dropping the checkered flag on this race between two careers: Do I keep my part time job or return to my seasonal employment? I've been running pros and cons through my head for awhile now. The jobs are in a dead heat right now, which is scary.

My supervisors from each of the jobs want to be declared the winner in this race. On the homefront, my husband and I are not in total agreement about what my career future should hold. My husband prefers I not turn away from the higher income (the seasonal job). I'm not sure the income is worth the loss of my sanity, which proved to be the case last fall. I'm fairly certain I want to stay with the part-time job and hold out hope for some added way to supplement that income. If I don't return to the seasonal work, I do have some vacation time I could cash out to help extend my income to "full-time status" for another month. Also, when I weigh out the cost savings of working from home (no travel costs, no "drive-through" meals, less new clothing, etc.), the difference between the two salaries shrinks a little bit. I know I can't work part time forever, but a little longer would be nice. With a little luck, this new job should yield a few more hours by fall. One plus, my friends tell me I look good (as compared to what, I wonder) and seem more relaxed now that I have been away from my seasonal job for a couple months. I will be in a different position if I return to the seasonal job, but I don't believe it will be less stressful. I know that if the economy hadn't tanked last fall, the part-time job would definitely win, hands down, because I'd have a better chance of finding supplemental income. There is a possibiIity that I can work in a lesser capacity at my seasonal job, with those discussions currently underway. In that scenario, my current part-time job would be my primary employment, while I would work 10-20 hours a week at the seasonal employer. I know my supervisor there would be okay with that, but I'm not certain her supervisors would. I hope to have an answer on my proposal soon.

Meanwhile, I have been looking back through the rearview mirror at what I've accomplished over the last two months, and it has definitely not been enough! Then I peer even further back, and realize what a crazy road I've been traveling. I'm trying to catch up from dozens of years of working too much overtime and not keeping up on daily life. I can't possibly catch up this quickly when I've gotten so far behind. I've banished too many things to the overflowing storage room, attic, basement, and garage, as well as some of it not landing in storage at all, and the time has come to make decisions. Most of the difficult decisions come as I am sorting through mounds of career "materials" I've acquired. Depending on my career decision, and if it is for the long haul, will help decide what I keep. Right now, it's sort & ponder. If I am to continue to work on the tuning up and overhauling of this engine (me), and tackle the repairs and organizing of my parking area (home), I feel I should "race" less.

Is it wrong of me to want to regain some semblance of tranquility in my life? I've been in overdrive for a long time! Heck, I live on a lake I have not been able to fully enjoy for the past dozen or so summers. I haven't planted flowers in my flower boxes for quite a few years. I have turned down more "summer fun" invitations than I care to acknowledge. My trip to to the northwest last summer really started this process for me, I believe. It had been the first summer trip I'd taken in a dozen years, and I realized how much I've missed while putting my nose to the grindstone. Of course, with less income, I may not be able to travel anyway, but I could relax and enjoy what is under my nose.

As I look at all of this in the rear view mirror, knowing what I've already passed by, I ponder what is ahead of me on the road. Is the map I'm using outdated? Are there hairpin curves that will catch me off guard and make me wish I'd stayed on the safer, but less scenic route? Am I going to choose to stop and visit the scenery along the way, or am I going to continue barreling forward, full speed ahead to an unknown destination, missing the highlights along the way? I just realized this blog is starting to sound like the lyrics of one of my favorite Bon Jovi cruising songs. I better make sure I have my plastic dashboard Jesus along for the ride on this Lost Highway!

The Music Highlights Of My Life

I received this in an email, but thought it might be a fun blog topic, as well. What was the #1 Song on the Day you were born? I expanded this a bit and looked up the songs that correlated with some of the other important milestones in my life.

Go to http://www.joshhosler.biz and look up the number one song on your birth date or other special days. If you are inclined to play along, leave the answer(s) in my comments.

On the day of my birth, the #1 song was Alley-Oop by The Hollywood Argyles.

On the day of my hubby's birth: Young Love by Tab Hunter.

My entry into the teen years: Will It Go Round In Circles by Billy Preston

On my graduation from high school: With a Little Luck by Paul McCartney and the Wings

On our engagement day: Bette Davis Eyes by Kim Carnes

On our wedding day: Abracadabra by The Steve Miller Band

Child # 1's Birth: Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler

Child # 2's Birth: Walk Like An Egyptian by The Bangles

Child # 3's Birth: Black Velvet by Alannah Myles

This was a great trip back in time! What amazed me most was that I was paying attention to the music through the years, because I remembered all of the songs. I hope to hear a few of yours.

This is me during a technological frustration.

If asked whether I love or hate technology, I'd have to answer: "It depends on the day and the project I'm trying to accomplish."

I use the computer on a fairly regular basis, both for work and personal endeavors. I can set up most basic hardware and software, although when it comes to glitches, I have very little patience. I am far from a techie, although I could be coached through fixing most problems when they spring up.

When I first started my home office job in November, I was given a laptop & printer. It was the start of over two months of struggles getting it to cooperate. I could get the internet, but not get on the company network. I spent many hours with tech assistance on the phone, trying this and trying that. Finally, after many attempts, I was able to access the network, but not synchronize files, etc. I was happy to be able to get into the network, only to find I now couldn't access the internet and my email. While I could get at email through my personal computer, I didn't really want to be saving all my work to my personal laptop. I spent a fair amount of time transferring work from one computer to another - UGHH! About then, I'd say I couldn't stand technology. It took 2 1/2 months before all the problems were finally solved (it would have been sooner if a few people would have listened to me). Now that the computer is mostly cooperating, I'll have to try to get all the features of my printer/fax/scanner working. I'm still trying to save up my patience.;-)

Our newest feature for work is participating in conference calls with Skype, a service which allows us to talk/conference for free. Downloading Skype was piece of cake. The plan was to have a webcam, even though it can be done with just voice. I picked up the webcam, which should have also been a piece of cake, but for some reason, it just won't work with my work laptop. I keep getting a USB error message claiming no driver was installed. I tried it on my own laptop, and got the same message. I let it sit a couple days, and was going to return it today, but thought I'd give it another try. Well today, it works on my personal computer, but still not my work computer. UGGHHH! Again, not good scores for technology.

In the midst of all of this, however, I looked down at the front of my computer and noticed my wireless light was blue, meaning it was on & working. I'll be darned! I have been without that function for a couple months--it just quit working one day, along with my speakers. I downloaded new drivers for both functions but was only able to get my speakers back. Several times I tried to reload the driver over the months, to no avail. The error message was always the same: no driver installed. Today, after several months of getting internet via the ethernet cable, with no rhyme or reason, it just began to work again. I have no idea how or why! HMMM...I wonder how long it will last?

On the bright side of technology, we have access to so much more information and more ways to stay connected to others than we did even a few years ago. For instance, now that I'll be Skyping for work, I plan to expand that practice and send my daughter in Texas a webcam so we can keep in touch a little easier and cheaper. I will also probably start suggesting the practice to other family members. Another way to stay in contact is with Facebook, although sometimes I am a little shocked at what I read...so maybe there is some drawback to that. Instant Messaging also is popular, though I rarely partake. I have so many family members, that it would be hard to keep up with them all by old fashioned means, but through computer contact, I can keep in touch at any hour of the day.

Another great technological advancement has been the wide array of public information available online. As a family historian, it is amazing how much can be tracked online, without having to make dozens of trips to the history museums. It still requires a lot of sleuthing, but that's the fun of it. I have saved thousands of miles on my car, plus, I can search the web at any hour, not just museum hours. Of course, technology can't replace the feel of the ancestral stomping grounds beneath ones feet. That requires a hands on visit. :-) I have crossed paths with numerous relatives online over the years, as I piece together the patchwork quilt that is my family. In fact, a few years back, I was able to contact numerous relatives I'd never met and plan a sesquicentennial of one of my ancestral family's arrival, mostly by tracking via the internet. It was so cool!

Google, or any search engine, for that matter, are lifesavers. The other day, I needed a Hawaiian themed dish for a going away party at work. I typed in a couple words, and I immediately had a recipe for Aloha bread. (It was delicious!) I could have spent an entire afternoon trying to find a suitable recipe in my cookbook collection. On another day, I might want to know an author or a songwriter, so I type in a phrase, and just about everything I ever needed to know is at my fingertips. I may be researching for work or I may want to read about news in locations around the country, or around the world, and its all at my fingertips. Perhaps I have a home improvement question or need to buy a certain item. A quick search, and an answer is at hand. I love the internet.

The availability of classes online are also a technological plus. Whether just for fun, or for academic credit, participating in online classes, webinars, and conferences can save lots of time and money over attendance at brick and mortar institutions. I especially like the abiility to participate on my timeline. It may not be for everyone, but it is nice for some learning.

Finally, the ability to pay bills, complete banking, look for a job, order library books, or complete virtual shopping expeditions, are all technological conveniences I've become accustomed to and those activities raise my love for technology.

So, for most of my activities, I love technology. When it's not working, I have a hard time being patient while trying to find a solution. On a scale of 1-10, I give technology an 8.

Laughing Gas At The Dentist

I'm in the process of getting a crown, after the painful process of a root canal. It is no secret to those who know me that I hate going to the dentist. I think it all stems from having very painful experiences as a kid, and since we were poor, the visits were far & few in between. I was one of the kids in my family that didn't have "good teeth." One of my dentists explained once that my teeth were not as hard as some. I'm not sure if that is genetic or environmental. Thus, when I went to the dentist, there were always lots of cavities to fill, and my childhood dentist was not too gentle. Once I was old enough to pay my own bills, I chose his competitor, to the consternation of my family, as my previous dentist was my dad's friend. He (the new dentist) was gentler and used gas. He also did really good work, albeit a little more expensively.

After I moved to another part of the state, I found another dentist, whom I went to for a number of years. He was nice, and most importantly, he used gas. I needed gas to relax me so that I could handle the novacaine, which I usually need in multiple dosages. Then, for convenience sake when I was doing daycare, plus an insurance/billing snafu and an enormous amount of unexpected dental bills (long story), I switched dentists to one that was located right in my town, so I wouldn't have to take huge amounts of time off to go to the dentist. I like him. He's nice and very open about charges & billing, so I never have surprises at the end. Once, when the work done went over my insured amount, he knocked the extra amount off as a professional courtesy. I've stayed with him ever since, even when he closed his office and moved to a nearby city.

The only issue I have with this dentist is he doesn't routinely use gas. I get so tense when I am being worked on, and absolutely hate the administration of novacaine. The gas would be relaxing. I asked about it recently and found they do have it, they just don't use it much because insurance won't cover it. I'm not sure if that is something more recent, as I used to get it years ago. I probably should have asked what the cost would be if I paid for it out of my pocket, since it takes me almost to the end of the work being done before I can will myself to unclench my fists and relax my rigid body. I sometimes think I just have a low tolerance for pain, but the dental assistant assured me I handle it far better than some. Maybe that is because I restrain myself and I don't lash out at how I'm really feeling.

However, as I was surfing various webs and blogs, I found a video of a child coming down from "laughing gas" after a dental procedure. Perhaps I'll pass on the gas, after all!

Kid on Laughing Gas

THE BEST MOM EVER

Today is my mom's birthday. Like so many other people, I think my mom is the best! She means the world to me. As the mother of 13 children, she made many sacrifices to get through 40+ years of child rearing. There are 24 years between my oldest sister and youngest brother. In honor of my mom's birthday, I am sharing with you the piece I wrote for her 75th birthday two years ago. The morning of her birthday, I woke up and wanted to write her a little message of sentiment, and this is what I came up with:

The Best Mom

When I was growing up, I had the best mom that there was,

I didn’t often tell her, but I loved her just because….

She nurtured me from a small babe, with gentle tenderness,

And being one of thirteen kids didn’t make her love me less.


For somewhere from inside her heart came a fountain overflowing,

With love, faith, strength, and wisdom; seemingly, ever knowing.

She sustained us all through lean times, with sacrifice and thrift,

But gave of herself freely, that was her greatest gift.


She sung her songs so sweetly, the ditties that to this day stick,

Like “A You’re Adorable,” “Mairzy Doats,” and the humorous “Chickory Chick.”

Learning and reading were encouraged, and the time she always took,

To assist me with my school work, or to read from a favorite book.

She cooked, she cleaned, she worked so hard, late into every night,

Yet was busy making breakfast at the crack of the new dawn’s light.

She took the time to listen, and accepted me for who I was,

She expected the best, which I didn’t always give, but she loved me just because.



I wasn’t often well behaved, I broke a lot of rules,

But somehow when I grew up, she’d lent to me her tools.

I learned that hard work wouldn’t hurt you, and often times it pays,

Not always in monetary dividends, but always in fulfilled days.

I passed along the songs and stories, to my children and others too,

And though my voice is not as sweet, a piece of her comes through.

I’ve borrowed her passion for children; I use it every day,

To share the love and nurturing I received along the way.


I’m not as good at sacrifice and my patience sometimes slips,

Sometimes letting unkind words pass between my lips.

As I cuddled my small children, or struggled through their teenage years,

I often thought of my mom’s way of handling troubles, fears, and tears.

And even though I’m all grown up and living far away,

I wonder with every choice I make, what my dear Mom would say.

I pray to God that He will guide me as my Mother always did,

When I was growing up as a baker’s dozen kid.


~~~~~~~~~~~~

To my MOM, on this day, celebrating seventy five years of living,

Thank you for being the Best Mom, and for your years and years of giving.
Since I wrote this on the quick the morning of her big day, I didn't get time to "properly edit," but I left it in its original form for what it meant to her. It is a piece that tells alot about the wonderful person she is and the unconditional love she gave. Though she doesn't read my blog, I'll give a shout out anyway:

Happy 77th Birthday Mom! I love you just because!

THE BOX

As so often times happens here on these blogs, mine and others, nostalgia arises. Perhaps, it is just the need in our hectic lives to return to a time more simple, when everything seemed perfect. Was it? Heck, NO! Somehow, our memories seem to polish away the imperfections. There are gems to be had in looking back, however.

Today, inspired by Country Woman, City Woman, I journey back to my childhood once again, to retrieve the box. My childhood wasn't filled with expensive toys or nice clothes. It wasn't free from pain. It certainly wasn't always happy. I didn't come away from childhood severely scarred, though I would say I didn't come away unmarked, either. However, in the journeys back, nothing seems as painful or insurmountable as it did as a child. Back then, however, I had the box to help me through.

In her blog, entitled Visiting the Magic of Youth, Prairie Woman details the many imaginative games and activities that filled her days growing up in smalltown North Dakota. I could relate to so many of those activities (growing up in small town Minnesota). As adults, we often forget what it was like to be a child, and leaving those childlike qualities behind, can sour us. Returning to those days of simplicity can teach us a thing or two about how to get through the tough moments and can be a sweetener for a bitter day. When things were tough as a child, we journeyed to a land of make believe. Here, no one could hurt you, because you held all the power and magic that kept evil away. You could imagine yourself to be anyone and do anything, because even if the reality was that you were poor and hungry, you could imagine it to be something different. If you were lucky like me, you may have also had a box.

What is this box of which I speak? It was my refuge. My get away from it all abode. In my case, it was an old appliance box...(refrigerator). The box had been hauled up to the bedroom I shared with four other sisters. It was placed on its side under the clothes in the makeshift closet (a closet pole suspended from the ceiling). Pillows and blankets were piled inside for comfort. It was a place to hide out, nap in the middle of the day, or just simply get away. It could be my own little cabin, my castle, my cave, my library, or my art nook. It was a place of serenity when I was mad, angry, fearful, or tired. As a child, as much as today, I recharged best when I was alone. I need reflection time and peace and quiet. I need a space to call my own. The box fit the bill nicely back then.

One day, I caused my family much concern. They hadn't heard from me in hours. Supper came and went without me. We were quite free to roam the town, but we usually didn't miss supper. My siblings were sent to scour the neighborhood. No signs of me. My friends' families were called. Not there. My dad got in his van and drove about town. No luck. The local police officer was called when all the other search efforts failed. Around 10 PM, I awoke and went down stairs, to a surprised but relieved family. They had failed to check the box, which was partially hidden behind the racks of clothes. I had nestled up and fallen asleep. One feeling that was not lost on me that night, even at a tender young age, was that my family really cared, even though there were moments I was sure they didn't (it took a few more later lessons to reinforce that, though).

As a parent, my children had a box. As a daycare provider, my charges had a box. As a teacher, my preschoolers had a box. If the box got torn, we replaced it. If there were none available for awhile, we covered a card table with a large sheet or blanket. At times, we used a small pup tent. It worked the same. It was a place where a child could get away from it all...envelope themselves in down time. Recharge with no interference from the outside world.

Well, we can't imagine our bills away, nor loss of jobs, medical problems, or betrayal of false friends. Through the eyes of a child, however, we can learn to find joy in the simplest of life's treasures. Each day brings new light. Everyday is filled with possibilities if we imagine them. Sometimes, we need to reflect on just what it is that is important. A few minutes or hours away fom the hub-bub of the seemingly insurmountable is sometimes all that is needed to recharge and put things into perspective.

And if you're really lucky, you have known one of the simplest of life's treasures: the refrigerator box.